Defeating doubt, worry and fear this year

Romans 15:4 tells us: “For whatsoever things were written aforetime were written for our learning, that we through patience and comfort of the scriptures might have hope.” 

Introduction:
It is usually after Christmas and into January that people begin to experience waves of worry, doubt and fear. Along with the New Year comes concerns about how one will overcome what can be sometimes the anxieties associated with mounting expectations for the upcoming year. 

So, what is the difference between doubt, worry and fear? For Christians, doubt has to do with resistance to past insights from God and His Word spoken to me in the past.  Fear has to do with my hesitation in responding to God and His Word in the present.  If doubt has to do with what God said in the past, and fear has to do with how I’m relating to Him in the present, then worry deals with my perceptions of what He will do in the future. These spiritual maladies lie in the background of many of the garden variety worries, doubts and fears we experience on a daily basis. Dr. Adrian Rogers has noted that worry is a mild form of atheism. When one really thinks about it - doubt, fear and worry are species of unbelief. 

Now in pointing these things out, I certainly do not claim to be immune from such maladies. I find at times such states of anxiety coming over me like the periodic waves that roll onto the beach due to the invisible tug of the moon's gravity in the patterns of tide. The anxious soul can drift into such states without hardly being aware. Experiencing such things is not a sin itself, as long as we don't entertain them and give into their lies. If we do, there are provisions of grace to overcome them. These three emotional and spiritual states are weaponry used by the enemy to plague the people of God.  The Christian's spiritual warfare includes battling these species of unbelief that want to run unchecked in the human heart. When left untamed, doubt, fear and worry will contribute to blurring our vision of God and His character.  

Thankfully, God has given us the indwelling Holy Spirit, the Sovereignty Lordship of Jesus Christ and the scriptures to combat these and other devices used by the enemy of our souls.  Thus we will considering some key passages from one of the great chapters in the Bible - Psalm 37.

Remember, use your sword in battling worry, fear and doubt

So where are you finding yourself doubting, worrying or fearing?  I would encourage you to read the scriptures out loud.  What Paul writes in Romans 10:17 concerning the beginnings of saving faith also applies to how one is kept in saving faith: “So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.”  I would encourage you to turn to Psalm 37 note some incredible verses that gives the believer the arsenal needed to defeat doubt, worry and fear.  

1. Warnings to heed

Psalm 37:8 states: “Cease from anger, and forsake wrath: fret not thyself in any wise to do evil.”  Notice that underlined word “fret”?  At least three times we find it mentioned in this Psalm.  In the Hebrew language this word “fret” is translated for the term “chara”.  "Chara" refers to literally getting oneself all hot and bothered or stirring up oneself into a heated frenzy.  Does that describe how you are feeling and dealing with life?  Do you feel pressure building in your gut, like you are going to explode?  That’s the Psalmist's warning to us.  So what is the solution? Consider the next thought.

2. Walk in the rest of God

Psalm 37:1-8 acts as a series of bullets that you can use when that disturbing, troubling notion grips your heart.  Note how God gives a series of commands.  Commands are particularly important, since for every command in scripture there is always a provision of grace to carry them out.  God’s commands are not given because I’m simply able to do them.  Many people get discouraged when trying to carry out God’s commands.  They will say: “They are just too hard”.  Dear friend, the commands of God are not hard, they are impossible – that is, if you are not taking advantage of God’s provision of grace. 

Note how we are given instruction on resting is God in the following verses: “Fret not” in 37:1; “Trust” in verse 3; “Delight in the Lord” in verse 4; “Commit your way” in verse 5.  With these commands we see the provision of grace in verse 6: “And He shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light, and thy judgment as the noonday.”  

So if you are in the midst of darkness, note that God’s word gives you provision to enjoy an open heaven, a noonday sun despite the midnight of your circumstance.  Psalm 37:7 tells us to “rest in the Lord” and in verse 8 to “cease from anger”.  We are not promised immunity from trouble, however we are given the “rest of God” whereby we can rise above doubt, worry and fear. So heed the warning and walk in God's rest as you battle doubt, worry and fear. But now notice one final strategy in overcoming worry, fear and doubt... 

3. Winning the battle (by knowing that God is fighting for you)

Psalm 37:40 states: “And the Lord shall help them, and deliver them: he shall deliver them from the wicked, and save them, because they trust in him.”  What is remarkable about this Psalm is that it begins with the command not to fret, and it ends with the confidence of victorious faith.  This is not a “pie in the sky, sweet by and by” theology, this is real life doctrine for the "nasty now-and-now".  Knowing that God will never leave me, not forsake me, is more than enough to overcome doubt, worry and fear.

The Six Introverted Personality Temperament Blends

Romans 12:4-5 "For just as we have many members in one body and all the members do not have the same function, 5 so we, who are many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another."

1 Corinthians 12:27 "Now you are Christ’s body, and individually members of it."

1 Peter 4:10 "As each one has received a special gift, employ it in serving one another as good stewards of the manifold grace of God."

Introduction:

The past few of posts have been driven with the desire to equip God's people and church with the ability to increase understanding of one another. In the scriptures above, God has different people of different temperaments in the local church. According to Dr. Tim Lahaye's book: "Spirit-controlled Temperament", the four personality temperaments (choleric, sanguine, melancholy & phlegmatic) can yield up to twelve different combinations. Furthermore, each person has all four types, with one, two or sometimes three being the dominate ones in different measure. When we consider how each person is wired and has different levels of each temperament style, the blends and combinations can certainly exceed the ideal 12 blends. 

The Lord is so creative and innovative. If we can appreciate how each of these temperaments interact with one another, and the beauty that can result from such interaction, how can we not praise God for how such a design exists in the local church and in our families? It was with thoughts such as these that we ended yesterday's post. We looked at six extroverted temperament styles in yesterday's post. Today we want to consider the final six temperament blends that are spelled out in Dr. Tim Lahaye's book: "Spirit-Controlled Temperament". These final six are noted for being "introverted" in their expression. Before we get to them and for the sake of review, let me briefly review the four temperaments by showing how they relate to people being extroverted and introverted.

Extroverts and Introverts
I'm sure the reader has heard of these terms "extrovert" and "introvert". An extrovert is an outgoing person who wears their emotions on their sleave and divulges their thoughts to people. Introverts are those who prefer to stay in the back ground and keep to themselves. When it comes to this issue of temperaments, two of them are extroverted (choleric and sanguine) and two are more introverted (melancholy and phlegmatic). Keeping these distinctions in mind may aid in understanding the following combinations and blends of temperaments we find ourselves or other people having and living out every day. 

The Six Introverted Personality Temperaments (based off of Dr. Tim Lahaye's Book: Spirit-Controlled Temperaments)
The blends of the four personality temperments (choleric, sanguine, phlegmatic and melancholy) are stated in terms of one dominate and one secondary temperament. Thus for example, if a person has a dominate choleric personality temperament with a melancholy temperament being a secondary influence, we would term that temperament combination: ChlorMel (Choloric dominate and Melancholy temperment being second). Let the reader note below the following extroverted temperament blends, as spelled out by Dr. Tim Lahaye:

1). The MelSan = Dr. Tim Lahaye notes: "Now we turn to the predominately introvertish temperaments. Each will look somewhat similar to one we have already examined, except that the two melded temperaments will be reversed in intensity. MelSans make good scholars and are probably the best of all teachers, particularly for high-school and college students. Their Melancholy nature will ferret out little-known facts and be exacting in the use of detail, while the Sanguine will communicate well with students. They usually major in the social sciences, theology, philosophy, literature, or the humanities."  According to Dr. Lahaye, many of the prophets could very well had been MelSans.

2). The MelChlor = Dr. Lahaye writes about this style: "For MelChlors, the mood swings of the Melancholy are somewhat stabilized by the Choleric's self-will and determination. The is almost nothing vocationally that these people cannot do-and do well. They are both perfectionists and drivers." Dr. Lahaye then notes that Luke in the New Testament may had been a MelChlor.

3). MelPhleg = Dr. Lahaye states concerning this blend: "They are not nearly as prone to hostility as the two previously discussed Melancholies and usually get along well with others. These gifted introverts combine the analytic perfectionism of the Melancholy with organized efficiency of the Phelgmatic. They are usually good-natured humanitarians who blossom in a quiet solitary environment for study and research." Dr. Lahaye suggests that the Apostle john may had been an example of this temperament blend. 

4). PhlegSan = According to Dr. Lahaye - "The easiest of the twelve temperament blends to get along with over the long haul are the PhlegSans. They are congenial, cooperative, thoughtful, people-oriented, diplomatic, dependable, fun-loving and humorous. They never dispaly an abrasive persoanlity and are negihborhood favorites-with adults and children." Dr. Lahaye suggests that Timothy in the New Testament was a PhlegSan.

5). PhlegChlor = Dr. Lahaye notes about this temperament: "The most active of all Phlegmatics are PhlegChlors. Predominately Phlegmatic, these people will still never become balls of fire. Like other Phlegmatics, they are easy to get along with and may become excellent group leaders. If properly trained, they make good foremen, exectutive vice presidents, accountants, educators, planners and laborers in almost any area of construction. Phlegmatics-excellent listeners, genuinely in other people-have the potential to become good counselors. They have the patience of Job and often are able to help those who have not found relif with other counselors. Their gentle spirit never makes people threatened." According to Dr. Lahaye, Abraham would had been perhaps a PhlegChlor.

6). The PhlegMel = In this final temperament blend, Dr. Lahaye notes: "Of all the temperament blends, PhlegMels are the most gracious, gentle, and quiet. PhlegMels are rarely hostile and almost never say anything for which they must apologize (mailny because they rarely say much). They never embarrass themselves or others, always do the proper thing, dress simply, and are dependable and exact." Dr. Lahaye writes more details, but in short, he considers Mark, the author of the Second Gospel in the New Testament to be this temperament blend.

Closing Thoughts:
These past several days have been dedicated to exploring what are called personality temperaments. We have leaned quite heavily on Dr. Tim Lahaye's book: "Spirit-controlled Temperament", Tyndale Publishers, 1992. I would encourage the reader to go to a website like Amazon and purchase the book, it is well-worth the read. Such considerations like those we have explored in these past few posts can aid greatly in understanding people in our families, our churches and even ourselves. 

The wisdom found in such a study certainly meshes well with what scripture has to say about God making man in His image. When we survey the Biblical text, there are roughly 2,000 different people of all different personality temperaments. My prayer is that these studies have provided a launching point for further reflection in how we can better appreciate and pray for one another. 

The Six Extroverted Personality Temperaments

Romans 12:4-5 "For just as we have many members in one body and all the members do not have the same function, 5 so we, who are many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another."

1 Corinthians 12:27 "Now you are Christ’s body, and individually members of it."

1 Peter 4:10 "As each one has received a special gift, employ it in serving one another as good stewards of the manifold grace of God."

Introduction:

The past couple of posts have been driven with the desire to equip God's people and church with the ability to increase understanding of one another. In the scriptures above, God has different people of different temperaments in the local church. According to Dr. Tim Lahaye's book: "Spirit-controlled Temperament", the four personality temperaments (choleric, sanguine, melancholy & phlegmatic) can yield up to twelve different combinations. Furthermore, each person has all four types, with one, two or sometimes three being the dominate ones in different measure. When we consider how each person is wired and has different levels of each temperament style, the blends and combinations can certainly exceed the ideal 12 blends. 

The Lord is so creative and innovative. If we can appreciate how each of these temperaments interact with one another, and the beauty that can result from such interaction, how can we not praise God for how such a design exists in the local church and in our families? It was with thoughts such as these that we ended yesterday's post. Today we want to consider six of the twelve different temperament blends that are spelled out in Dr. Tim Lahaye's book: "Spirit-Controlled Temperament". Before we get to them, let me briefly review the four temperaments by showing how they relate to people being extroverted and introverted.

Extroverts and Introverts
I'm sure the reader has heard of these terms "extrovert" and "introvert". An extrovert is an outgoing person who wears their emotions on their sleave and divulges their thoughts to people. Introverts are those who prefer to stay in the back ground and keep to themselves. When it comes to this issue of temperaments, two of them are extroverted (choleric and sanguine) and two are more introverted (melancholy and phlegmatic). Keeping these distinctions in mind may aid in understanding the following combinations and blends of temperaments we find ourselves or other people having and living out every day. 

The Six Extroverted Personality Temperaments (based off of Dr. Tim Lahaye's Book: Spirit-Controlled Temperaments)
The blends of the four personality temperments (choleric, sanguine, phlegmatic and melancholy) are stated in terms of one dominate and one secondary temperament. Thus for example, if a person has a dominate choleric personality temperament with a melancholy temperament being a secondary influence, we would term that temperament combination: ChlorMel (Choloric dominate and Melancholy temperment being second). Let the reader note below the following extroverted temperament blends, as spelled out by Dr. Tim Lahaye:

1). The SanChlor = a mixture of two extrovertish temperaments. The SanChlorwill have a happy charisma combined with organizational skills. Lahaye mentions Simon Peter as a possible SanChlor, being that he had a combined charisma and natural ability to jump ahead and be the leader.

2). The SanMel = SanMels are highly emotional people who fluctuate drastically. Dr. Lahaye notes: "They can laugh hysterically one minute and burst into tears the next. It is almost impossible for themm to hear a sad tale, observe the tragic plight of another person, or listen to music without weeping profusely. They genuinely feel the grief of others." Dr. Lahaye then points out that King David could had possibly been a SanMel.

3). SanPhleg = Dr. Lahaye notes: "The easiest person to like is the SanPhleg. The overpoweringand often obnoxious tendencies of a Sanguine are offset by the gracious, easygoing Phlegmatic. SanPhlegs are happy-go-lucky people whose carefree spirit  and good humor make them lightheartened entertainers. Helping people is their regular business, along with various forms of sales." Dr. Lahaye conceives of the New Testament associate of the Apostle Paul, Apollos, as being a SanPhleg personality temperament.

4). The ChlorSan = As can be seen by the name, this temperment has a dominating chloric temperament with a blended secondary sanguine temperament. According to Dr. Lahaye, this is the second strongest extroverted temperament style. Lahaye notes: "ChlorSans are almost completely given over to activity. Most of their efforts are productive and purposeful, but watch out for their reactions; they can become volatile in a moment! They are natural promoters and can sell almost anything. And they have enough charisma to attract and get along well with others." According to Dr. Lahaye, the New Testament author James fits under this category, being that he wrote with a bold style and yet was very influential in the early church.

5). The ChlorMel = Dr. Lahaye notes regarding this personality temperament blend: "The optimism and practicality of a Chloeric overcomes the moodiness of the Melancholy, making the ChlorMel both goal-oriented and detailed. Such an individual usually does well in school, possess a quick, analytical mind, yet is decisive. The Chlor Mel develops into a capable leader, the kind you can always count on to do an extraordinary job."  According to Dr. Lahaye, the Apostle Paul may very well had been a ChlorMel. 

6). ChlorPhleg = According to Dr. Lahaye, this temperament blend is the most subdued of the extrovertish temperaments. He writes: "a ahhpy blend of the quick, active, and hot with the calm, cool and unexcited. ChlorPhlegs are not as apt to rush into things as quickly as the extroverts we've previously discussed in this chapter; they are more deliberate and subdued. Though they may not impress you that way at first, they are extremely capable in the long run." According to Dr. Lahaye, Titus, the young pastor to whom Paul wrote in the Epistle of Titus, may very well has been a Chlor Phleg.

The hope today has been in introducing the reader to this helpful area of understanding people's personalities and the further categories we can use in identifying key personality traits. We considered today six extroverted temperament blends. Tomorrow we will look at the introverted tempermant blends that are dominated by the melancholy and phlegmatic temperaments.

Seeing how God uses different blends of personality temperaments in families and churches

Romans 12:4-5 "For just as we have many members in one body and all the members do not have the same function, 5 so we, who are many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another."

Introduction and Review

The past couple of days has been devoted to understanding how God uses different personality temperaments in the overall design of His church. How different types of people that live and minister in our churches can just as easily valuable in understanding our families as well. If anything, the family is the most fundamental relational unit designed by God. Just as individuals makes up families, such families and individuals who are born-again by the Spirit of God make up our churches. In three major sections of Paul's letters (Romans 12; Ephesians 4 and 1 Corinthians 12-14) and Peter's first epistle in chapter 4, we see extended discussion on both the natural and supernatural design of God in both families and churches. 

In this particular series of posts I am interested in exploring the natural, physical and personality make-up categories that God has designed into the life of each person. Such an area of study has been around for centuries and Bible teachers have found such a study valuable in helping people understand why they do and respond like they do. A few days ago I mentioned that I am convinced that over 3/4 of the conflicts we see in churches arises as a result of not understanding each other. 

We have been using four fictional characters to unpack the four personality temperaments that we find in people: Carl Choleric; Sam Sanguine; Molly Melancholy and Fred Phlegmatic. If the read will recall, our four characters had come to a red-light in the center of an imaginary town that gave us opportunity to see how they respond in a given situation. We saw Carl Choleric being the guy who is task oriented and prone to telling others what needs to get done. When we met Sam Sanguine, he was the guy who wanted to wave hello at everyone and even though he too was excited about his trip, he more so was interested in meeting people. Molly Melancholy was very detailed and thoughtful and was willing to take turns if necessary. Then there was Fred Phlegmatic who thought it comical to watch everyone else but was content on waiting to get to his destination, knowing he would get there on time and knowing what he would do.

Well now all four of our characters have arrived at their destination and have met and are now returning to their individual homes. We won't have them go through a red-light again but rather we want to understand further this concept of personality temperament and understand that for every person, there are blends of all four of these temperament types, as well as certain temperaments working differently in different people. Later on we will see how this insight aids in understanding what happens in our families and churches, based upon the scriptures cited above. 

Carl Choleric's home - a combination of order and creativity

Carl is married to a woman who is Melancholy - the creative, mainly introverted and thoughtful personality type. Carl and his wife love each other very much and their combined temperaments balance each other very well. Their one daughter exhibits her mother's melancholy thoughtfulness, her dad's tendency to be focused on a task. However what makes their daughter interesting is that she has a dominate sanguine personality, with a smattering of phlegmatic tendency to play practical jokes. Carl and his wife are proud of their daughter. She is very likable as a sanguine but when placed in large groups tends to be quieter, due to inheriting her mother's melancholy traits. As Carl and his wife get to know their daughter more and more, they see in each of themselves smatterings of the other personality types, all combined uniquely under their dominate personality temperaments. 

Sam Sanguine's Home - Warm and Safe

When Sam arrives home, he greets his wife and son with a "hey everyone, daddy's home". His wife, a Phlegmatic, has been working steadily to make sure that their family has a nice meal and fun game after dinner. Sam's wife tends to be quieter, but when she says something, it is usually worthwhile listening to. Their son is like his mom - a Phlegmatic, but more so like his dad - a sanguine. He talks about his day with excitement but then reports how he is wanting to make sure his schedule doesn't get interrupted by surprises. The dominate sanguine and phlegmatic personality temperaments make this home a combination warm and safe place to be.

Molly's Home - Intellectual and purposeful

When Molly arrives home she waves at her husband who has been making some stir fry in the kitchen for the family. Molly instantly looks through the mail, since that was the first thing on her list of to-do's. Molly's husband is a combination choleric and phlegmatic, with the phlegmatic being the dominant personality temperament. Molly loves her husband due to the fact he is ever loyal and never leaves her side. When it comes to making decisions, her husband's choleric side tends to keep things focused. Molly, being a melancholy, reminds her husband to be sure to remember the appointments they have planned for the week. Their teenage daughter drives up as supper is about done being cooked. As Molly and her husband's daughter walks in, she strolls by calm and collective. As a sanguine she hugs her parents and begins to tell them about her day. Their daughter is a basketball player who also likes her new math class. However, her secondary phlegmatic temperament kicks in and she settles down quickly into getting the table set, just as she always does at dinner.  As the family eats their meal, each relays their day and soon each will be settling into their chairs to read a book and then end the evening watching their favorite t.v show or playing a board game.

Frank's home - Steady adventure

Frank Phlegmatic arrives home and is greeted with excited wife and son holding up plane tickets. Fred is the type of guys who likes to ease into his evening, but he can tell by the Sanguine personalities of his wife and son, that the evening is going to be a discussion about adventure. Frank's birthday is coming up, and his wife and son break the news that they are wanting to take Frank on a ski-trip. As they sit down to dinner, Frank is enjoying his food while his family goes on and on. After they finish, they ask excitedly: "well, what'ya think?" Frank slowly sipped his coffee and smiled and said: "That sounds good to me." At first Frank's wife and son stared at Frank in disbelief, not understanding how he could not be excited. However, Frank suddenly bursted out laughing, as only  Phlegmatic can do. Then Frank's wife and son realized they had been kidded around with by Frank, with Frank immediately saying - well, lets do it. I'm grateful you both would think of that for me. 

Closing thoughts

In the fictional accounts above, how many readers found the account more interesting to read than the red-light scenario of a couple of posts back? The hope of this writer is that today's post proved more interesting. To see how God has not only created people with temperament styles, but with different blends, makes for greater expressions of creativity, excitement, adventure and building of relationships. Each of the above homes were certainly different, and yet because they all understood one another, it proved to be a harmonious home-life for Carl, Sam, Molly and Fred. 

In the scriptures above, God not only has different people of different temperaments in families, but in the local church. According to Dr. Tim Lahaye's book: "Spirit-controlled Temperament", the four personality temperaments can yield up to twelve different combinations. Furthermore, each person has all four types, with one, two or sometimes three being the dominate ones in different measure. When we consider how each person is wired and has different levels of each temperament style, the blends and combinations can certainly exceed the ideal 12 blends. 

In the Romans 12 passage, as well as the other scriptures that speak about the Body of Christ and the differing gifts, the emphasis is as much on the diversity of God's people as there is their unity. The Lord is so creative and innovative. If we can appreciate how each of these temperaments interact with one another, and the beauty that can result from such interaction, how can we not praise God for how such a design exists in the local church and in our families?

More tomorrow....

Carl, Sam, Molly & Fred: How God uses different personality temperaments in His church

1 Cor 12:4-7 "Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit. 5 And there are varieties of ministries, and the same Lord. 6 There are varieties of effects, but the same God who works all things in all persons. 7 But to each one is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good."

Introduction and review
When Paul writes what he did up in 1 Corinthians 12, his concern was to show how the Triune God has so designed the church to be a reflection of Himself as a redeemed community unified in Jesus Christ that expresses such devotion in diverse ways. Spiritual gifts are the primary focus of the texts and are supernaturally given graces given out by the Holy Spirit at salvation. When we speak of personality temperaments, these are natural inborn traits that everyone has and which tend to fall into four general categories of description (choleric, sanguine, melancholy and phlegmatic). The goal today is to further our understanding on this subject and to see what happened to our four friends who were stopped at the stop light. 

Carl, Sam, Molly and Fred proceed forward
Fred Phlegmatic and Molly Melancholy were both the type of people who preferred others to go first, since they by this point had all kinds of things going through their minds. Sam Sanguine and Carl Choleric were revving their engines. Sam was excited to get to where he was heading. He just hoped that despite forgetting the itinerary, he would be able to influence others to help her along the way. Carl Choleric began honking his horn and it was time to get down the road. Carl then realized that he recognized the other three drivers, and that they all were going to the same destination. So to save face he decided to direct the other three to go first. Sam Sanguine jumped at the opportunity and went first. When Carl tried to wave on Molly Melancholy and Fred Phelgmatic, each of them just stared at each other, hoping the other could move. They pointed to Carl to go ahead and so with a quick thumbs up Carl gunned it and sped off. Molly Melancholy decided that it might be best for Fred Phlegmatic to go, since it is etiquette to let the person to your right go first.  Once Fred left, Molly then proceeded but first needed to stop and a cup of coffee, since the destination to where she was heading did not serve good coffee.

The church that God has designed is composed of different types of temperaments

The above little story was designed to get you and I to think about the different types of personalities God has made to occupy our world and our churches. When I think of the local church from a Biblical standpoint, it is like the little town. There are governing standards (God's Word, the Bible); the Mayor or we could say the King of Kings (Jesus Christ), the Sherriff (The Holy Spirit), deputies (Pastors, Elders, Deacons) and the town's people with businesses and homes that make the town life, breath and work by their differing gifts (all Christians, including the pastors, Elders and Deacons). 

The above fictitious characters are so-named from the four personality types that have been identified throughout history. Tim Lahaye in his book; "Spirit-controlled Temperament", page 2, defines temperament as: "that combination of inborn traits that subconsciously affects all of your behavior." Others, including Lahaye, have described temperament as answering the question: "why you do what you do". 

Lahaye goes onto define two other words closely related to "temperament" - namely "character" and "personality". Character is in Lahaye's words: "the real you when no one is looking". According to Lahaye, character combines your temperament, training, moral values, beliefs and habit patterns. In thinking on Lahaye's distinction of character, if "temperament" represent the raw material from whence people are made from the traits inherited from their parents, character represents the chisels, the hammers and tools taken in by that person in the shaping and molding of that person. Certainly God in His Sovereignty affects people unto salvation, bringing about progressive change in the character of the Christian and thus an alteration in the temperament. 

The second related word: "personality", is defined by Lahaye as the outward expression of one's character. We could say that personality is the paint and final touches that over time reflect to others who we are or who we want them to thin we are. Again in the life of the Christian, the Holy Spirit's work of inward transformation of the character should over times align the personality on the outside with what's going on inside.

In the above little story, not only did Carl, Sam, Fred and Molly represent the four main temperaments (respectively Choleric, Sanguine, Phelgmatic and Melancholy), but undoubtedly everyone living and working in the town had combinations of these temperaments which made the town a truly remarkable place to live. 

The more we identify God's design and yield to His will, the less conflict and more appreciation we will have for fellow Christians

God has so designed the church to be composed of those whom He set His affection upon that are not cookie-cutter people, but different. In 1 Corinthians 12:4-7, in-as-much as the text is all about the unity of the Body of Christ, three times in as many verses we read the word: "variety". I am convinced that over three-quarters of the disputes that arise in the church stem from misunderstanding one another. 

Years ago I recall listening to a message series on the spiritual gifts. The pastor commented that the Holy Spirit's distribution of the gifts take into account the personality of the person. This insight has definite scriptural support. Within 1 Corinthians 12 for example, we read of how much of each person's individuality and uniqueness is factored into the Spirit's Sovereign decision in determining which people will receive what gifts. For example, 1 Corinthians 12:11  "But one and the same Spirit works all these things, distributing to each one individually just as He wills." Another text, 1 Corinthians 12:27 "Now you are Christ’s body, and individually members of it."

The types of people that occupy our churches and the gifts God has distributed to each person is so vital to understand. When you consider the different church to which Paul wrote, they all were - well - different? Why? Each one had different mixes of personality temperaments and giftings. These mixtures are what I term "the church's spiritual finger print". Just as our finger prints are God-given, each church is different due to grasping how God has and is molding each one to achieve the Great Commission and Great Commandment. 

More tomorrow....

The Stop-Light and Four Personality Temperaments

1 Cor 12:4-7 "Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit. 5 And there are varieties of ministries, and the same Lord. 6 There are varieties of effects, but the same God who works all things in all persons. 7 But to each one is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good."

Introduction:
Today's post aims to begin exploring the concept of how God uses different personality temperaments to achieve His purposes. Before we make any further comments on the text above, I want to introduce you to four people and a little story about them that illustrates what is meant by the idea of personality temperament. 

Meet Carl, Sam, Molly and Fred

There was once a small town that had at its center a stop light. The roads leading into and out of this town went to places and came from places of influence and possibility. For anything and anyone coming into and out of the town, there had to be a common understanding and agreed upon authority telling those going through the light when to go and when to stop. Thankfully the town charter had adopted the words of the State and Government that established such principles so that anyone coming into the town could proceed or stop at the light in order and go in peace.

The Mayor of the small town exercised the authority and the Sheriff and Deputies made sure all things were in order. Little businesses and homes peppered the country side and thoroughfares of that small municipality. 

One day four completely different people were coming toward the stop light at the same time. The first was Carl Choleric (pronounced Ko-lair-ick). Carl was the type of man that had no time for stop lights and was eager to get to his destination on time. Carl was a take-charge type of guy who was a good person to have if you need something done but who otherwise preferred to have it done yesterday. Carl's hope was that the light would stay green, however if it turned yellow, he would floor-it and hope to make it through before the dreaded "red-light" came up.

The second person was Sam Sanguine. Sam was a friendly outgoing fellow who though having a destination, yet had forgotten his itinerary at home. Sam Sanguine was not worried because for him, meeting people along the way and being a friendly outgoing person was just as important (or perhaps moreso) than getting the job done. Sam was a motivator who could get the ball rolling and convince others to follow him. However Sam also had the bad habit of not finishing things and moving onto something else. As Sam was approaching the stop light, his hope was that the light would be a quick one, however if he got to talking to the other people in the other cars waiting at the light, that was o.k too!

The third person was Molly Melancholy. Molly enjoyed thinking and doing creative things. She had her gps, maps and itinerary all laid out in alphabetical order. Molly had lists and lists of lists of what she was going to do before, during and after arriving at her destination. When Molly saw the stop light up ahead, she had researched how long the light would take to change from red to green. Molly at times could get moody if things didn't go her way, however she had three or four plans ready to go in case the light took longer than expected.

Then the fourth person heading towards the light at the center of town was Fred Phlegmatic. Fred was easy going and in no particular hurry. Fred was the kind of guy who could mutter things under his breath but would keep to himself unless prompted by someone to act. His destination was the same every week and he never missed one time, since his loyalty and love for regularity made him a valued person. Fred's slow and easy going ways could sometimes cause people to wonder why he took so long to do things. However, Fred was unconcerned about the red light up ahead and planned on slowing down before the light turned yellow.

The light in the center of town was a quick yellow light and so all four of our fictitious characters arrived at the same time. Sam Sanguine wanted to introduce himself, Molly Melancholy whipped out some paper to make another list and tried not to look up at the other three people but made sure she stayed focused on the light. Carl Choleric tapped his fingers and rolled his eyes at Molly and at Sam's excessive waving and friendliness. Poor Carl just wanted to get to "point B". Fred Phlegmatic was calm and surveyed each of the other three drivers and smiled, thinking of funny little jokes to pass the time. He figured the light would turn eventually and in the meantime, already had planned what he was going to do once he arrived at his destination.

Suddenly the light turned green and now the question was: who would go first? To find out, you will have to come back to our next post. Meanwhile, here is the point regarding personality temperaments and the above opening scripture as we close out today's post.

The point:
When Paul writes what he did up in 1 Corinthians 12, his concern was to show how the Triune God has so designed the church to be a reflection of Himself as a redeemed community unified in Jesus Christ that expresses such devotion in diverse ways. Spiritual gifts are the primary focus of the texts and are supernaturally given graces given out by the Holy Spirit at salvation. When we speak of personality temperaments, these are natural inborn traits that everyone has and which tend to fall into four general categories of description (choleric, sanguine, melancholy and phlegmatic). The goal is to further our discussion on this subject and to see what happens to our four friends. Blessings! More tomorrow....

Reining in your emotional-life and thought-life

Philippians 4:4-5  "Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice! 5 Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near."

Introduction

So many people today will pay untold amounts of money to have peace in their emotional-lives and thought-lives. Some will pursue addictions to secure what they think is lasting peace and control. The problem is that in trying to gain control, they lose control. 

The practical Christian life is lived out daily through two areas of the soul: the thought-life (the mind) and the emotional-life (the emotions or heart). We can liken the man of God's soul to a mighty-conflict. The war being waged is over whether the world or God's word will govern the man. In Philippians 4:4-9 we see the General, the Holy Spirit, giving the orders to the emotional-life and thought-life in Philippians 4:4-5. With the orders given, Philippians 4:6-9 represents the strategy for reining in the emotional-life and thought-life. 

Commands given for reining in the emotional-life and thought-life. Philippians 4:4-5

The Apostle Paul has two banners that function as themes necessary for both the emotional-life (Philippians 4:4) and the thought-life (Philippians 4:5). The Holy Spirit of God through the pen of the apostle is issuing the orders to the emotional-life in Philippians 4:4 - "Rejoice in the Lord always; again I say rejoice!" What is joy? The joy being commanded here by the Holy Spirit is the unshakable confidence that God has done, is doing and will continue to do His will in your life. The word "confidence" is the true essence of God-given joy. 

Author Oswald Chambers writes in his daily devotional classic "My Utmost for His Highest", dated for March 7th: "Huge waves that would frighten an ordinary swimmer produce a tremendous thrill for the surfer who has ridden them." Chambers then later notes: "The undiminished radiance, which is the result of abundant joy, is not built on anything passing, but on the love of God that nothing can change." 

Then we see a command issued to the thought-life in 4:5 "Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near". The phrase "gentle-spirit" could also be translated "sweet-reasonableness" or "readiness to forgive" and thus our thought-lives ought to be governed by what is most reasonable or ready to forgive. Those are the commands issued forth from the General, God Himself.   So then how do we carryout these two commands?

Practical steps for reining in the emotional-life and thought-life of the Christian. Philippians 4:6-9

Every time God issues forth a command in scripture, there is always at least one provision of grace available to carry out the command. The emotional-life is the first area of practical concern in applying the command from Philippians 4:4 of "rejoicing always". Men are emotional - whether they admit it or not. Dr. Adrian Rogers said it best years ago: "You can tell what is important to a man by what makes him angry, what makes him laugh and what makes him cry". Proverbs 29:11 reminds us - "Like a city that is broken into and without walls is a man who has no control over his spirit." Either your emotions will control you or you will control of your emotions. Note the following strategy for reining in the emotional-life:

1. Stop worrying, start praying. Philippians 4:6a 

Philippians 4:6a "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication....".

How many of you reading this right now are worry about something? Anxiousness here speaks of rolling whatever is bothering over and over and over again in your mind. You and I dear friend will often worry first and then pray last. Why not switch up our order? In applying the command to "rejoice", one of things you is realize that because God is in control, the main responsibility is to have confidence (joy) in Him. Nehemiah 8:10 reminds the believer that the "joy of the Lord is their strength". The Holy Spirit who is the General issuing the commands in Philippians 4:4-5 is the same One who indwells every believer. One of the greatest ways to unleash Spirit empowered joy in your emotional life is to sing, or hum or whistle songs of praise or hymns to yourself. (Ephesians 5:19-20) I have found that when I do that, the excesses that can often accompany any emotions are calmed. As Jesus notes in John 7:38, the Holy Spirit acts as a fountain of living water, and He desires to splash up into your emotional life. By doing as suggested above, you will find it easier over time to stop worrying and start praying. But notice also...

2. Stop griping, start thanking. Philippians 4:6b

Philippians 4:6b ...."with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God."

The best way to rid your emotional-life of bitterness and apply the command of "rejoicing always" is by giving thanks to God in all things. Begin with the smallest things: a warm bed, warm shower, a car that runs and so on. As you literally thank God for the smallest things, you will find so much to be thankful for that before you know it, you are beginning to look at situations from an eternal perspective.  

3. Claim the promise of peace and joy in your emotional life. Philippians 4:7

Philippians 4:7 "And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

How do you know when you have reined-in your emotional life? When you have the "peace of God" that surpasses all understanding. As you daily rein-in your emotional-life, you must claim the promise of God's unending peace. God's peace ruling the soul of the child of God is inexplicable by human standards. It is oftentimes in the severest trials where the saint of God is distinguished from the mere religious pretender. 

So then what of the thought-life? Being that the emotional and thought-lives are interconnected in these passages and in real-life, we will move on in considering how one can rein-in the thought-life:

4. Look for what God has given you, rather than what you don't have. Philippians 4:8

We begin at the end of Philippians 4:8 and work our way up to the beginning of the verse. We read in the latter part of Philippians 4:8b "if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things." The source of the thought-life's discontent often lies in assuming that God has somehow short-changed us. However when we begin to examine and think through what God has given us in regular life and eternal-life, we gain the ability to rein in our thought-lives. Notice how Paul writes: "If there is excellence", that is to say: "what makes you conclude that God is good and has done good in your life?" Then Paul says next: "If there is anything worthy of praise" - that is - what can you think of to praise God for? 

Then we're told to "think on these things" at the end of the verse. What things? Paul has given us the list of categories to work through as we rein-in the thought-life in Philippians 4:8a  "Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute....", Where do we find such things? The scriptures. The number one way by which the man of God can execute these instructions is through daily reading, study and application of the scriptures. (2 Corinthians 10:5; 2 Timothy 2:15; 3:16-17) When we do these things, we will be able to conclude in our minds that God has indeed given us more than we deserve. 

5. Claim the promise of peace and reasonableness in your thought-life. Philippians 4:9

We read in Philippians 4:9 "The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you."

Notice how the same promise of peace is given for the thought-life in 4:9 as we find for the emotional-life in 4:7. As man who has reined in his thought-life will be governed by the "gentleness of spirit" or "sweet-reasonableness" that we saw in Philippians 4:5. Reining in the thought-life entails reinforcing yourself with the positive spiritual realities spoken of in these verses. Only through such positive spiritual realities can you defeat or defend yourself against the negative realities thrown at you by the world, your flesh and the Devil himself. 

Conclusion:

In Philippians 4:4-9 we saw the only effective way we can rein in the thought-life and emotional-life. Philippians 4:4-5 gave the commands of rejoicing and exhibiting a gentle spirit or sweet reasonableness to all people. We then saw a strategy for practically taking these commands and reining in one's emotional-life and thought-life: 

1. Stop worrying, start praying

2. Stop griping, start thanking

3. Claim the promises of peace and joy in your emotional life

4. Look for what God has given you, rather than what you don't have

5. Claim the promise of peace and reasonableness sin your thought-life

Questions for thought:

1. How do you understand the relationship between your emotions and thoughts?

2. How does reining in your emotions and thoughts in stressful situations demonstrate to a watching world the Person of Jesus Christ in your life?

3. What is at least one take-away that you have gained from today’s lesson?  

P4 Guest Blogger Deborah Smith - Relational, Emotional and Spiritual Effects of Insecurities in Women

Genesis 1:27 "God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them."

Introduction: Guest Blogger Debi Smith
My wonderful wife Debi Smith has been featured in the past as a guest blogger on "Growing Christian Resources". Currently Debi is doing her Bachelors Degree in Christian Counseling at Liberty University. Recently I asked her if she would allow me to post her most recent paper that she did entitled: "Relational, Emotional, and Spiritual Effects of Insecurity in Women". I believe this topic is very important and that my wife's recent research and writing can provide an invaluable resource to the Body of Christ and readers of this blog. With that said we will be finishing today what Deb wrote, with the goal of concluding this very important series of posts on the issues surrounding women's insecurities. I now present to you once more, our guest blogger Deborah Smith:

Relational, Emotional, and Spiritual Effects of Insecurity in Women (continued)

Can an Insecure Woman Find Hope and Security in Jesus Christ?

The Bible is the answer book for all men and women who have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. If a person has surrendered their life under Jesus Christ’s Lordship, then the answer is a resounding “Yes!” There is most definitely hope. It is not an easy path to overcome insecurities. Healing and changing an unhealthy mindset does not happen overnight, however, Philippians 4:13 says, “I can do all things through Him who gives me strength” (NIV). What are some steps to overcoming the faulty thinking of insecurity?

Develop God-esteem, Rather than Self EsteemThe Bible has much to say about what a man and a woman’s identity is in Christ. In Dr. Neil T. Anderson’s book, “The Bondage Breaker”, he addresses that after a person comes to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ, meaning that they have recognized their need for a Savior and turned their hearts towards Him, every man and woman now can be secure in their “new identity”. In Christ all are accepted (John 1:12; John 15:15; Romans 5:1), all are secure (Romans 8), 2 Corinthians 1:21, 22), all are significant (Ephesians 2:10; Ephesians 3:12) (Anderson, 2000). 

Recognize That Only God Can Fill the VoidAll people have the need to be accepted and loved. God created people to be this way on purpose. Everyone has a void that is like a vacuum that cannot be satisfied by any person or thing. Only God Himself can meet this need and fill that empty place within every heart. Only He can give the unfailing love people desperately crave and desire (Moore et al, 2003). Not only does God fill the “love and acceptance” void in the heart of every one of His followers, but He promises that He will never disappoint. “Kings will be your foster fathers, and their queens your nursing mothers. They will bow down before you with their faces to the ground; they will lick the dust at your feet. Then you will know that I am the Lord; those who hope in me will not be disappointed” (Isaiah 49:23, NIV). He invites everyone to “taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the one who takes refuge in him” (Psalm 34:8, NIV).

Allow God to Heal the Past In regards to the past traumas and hurts that women have experienced, God can help move a person past the pain and into a wonderfully healthy relationship with Him. “Listen, daughter, and pay careful attention: Forget your people and your father’s house. Let the king be enthralled by your beauty; honor him, for he is your Lord” (Psalm 45:10-11, NIV). Regarding one’s past, He also says, “See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland” (Isaiah 43:19, NIV). 

Put God’s Approval above the Approval of ManIn the quest for acceptance, it is imperative that the approval that is sought out is God’s and not a mere human’s. Even the apostle Paul needed to remind himself of Whom He served and sought out to please. “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ” (Galatians 1:10, NIV). 

In conclusion, insecurity can originate from the deepest, darkest places inside a woman. Past traumas and hurts can serve as chains to hold one down. An unhealthy self-image and pride can perpetuate insecurities as well. Insecurity destroys relationships and devalues the person who harbors it. Insecurity can keep a person in an endless cycle of relationships that harm. However, through a saving relationship with Jesus Christ, insecurity’s power over a woman’s mind and heart can be broken. Self-esteem can be replaced by God-esteem. He alone can heal the past and enable His daughters to move forward in a new identity. Through God, the insecure can indeed become secure once and for all.

ReferencesAnderson, N. T. (2000). The Bondage Breaker. Eugene, Oregon: Harvest House Publishers.

Anderson, N. T. (2000). Victory Over the Darkness. Ventura, California: Regal books.

Berger-Stassen, K. (2011). The developing Person Through the Life Span 8th Edition. New York, New York: Worth Publishers.

Bleske-Rechek, A., & Lighthall, M. (2010). Attractiveness and Rivalry in Women's Friendships with Women. Hum Nat, 82-97.

Daly, R. (2010). Spotlight Shined on Hollywood's Unrealistic Portrayal of Women. Psychiatric News, 13,30.

Furman, R., Collins, K., Garner, M. D., Montanaro, K. L., & Weber, G. (2009). Using Social Work Theory for the Fascilitation of Friendships. Smith College Studies in Social Work, 17-33.

Holman, T. B., Galbraith, R. C., Timmons, N. M., Steed, A., & Tobler, S. B. (2009 30:413). Threats to Parental and Romantic Attachment Figures' Availability and Adult Attachment Insecurity. Journal of Family Issues, 413-429.

Moore, B. (2010). So Long Insecurity. Carol Stream, Illinois: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.

Moore, B., Briscoe, J., Wilson, S. D., Hart, K., Hager, D., & Wells, T. L. (2003). A Woman and Her God. Brentwood: American Association of Christian Counselors.

Quigg, S. L., & Want, S. C. (2011). Highlighting Media Modifications: Can a Television Commercial Mitigate the Effects of Music Videos on Female Appearance Satisfaction? Elsevier, 135-142.

Smart, C., Davies, K., Heaphy, B., & Mason, J. (2012). Difficult Friendships and Ontological Insecurity. The Sociological Review, 91-109.

Walker, K. (1994). Men, Women, and Friendship: What They Say, What They Do. Gender and Society, 246-265.

Want, S. C. (2009). Meta-analytic Moderators of Experimental Exposure to Media Portrayals of Women on Female Appearance Satisfaction: Social Comparisons as Automatic Processes. Elsevier, 257-269.